Thursday, 4 August 1864

Slept well, but rose late. Sad letters from poor Sarah, (sent the other half 10£ note to Arundel) & from Ellen. Worked hard mostly all day at the 10 Campagna drawings: but Charlton’s did not send the Drawers; & I hunted in vain for the large drawing of Gibbs’s Cervara, wh. I made on the spot; ― this & the Philates ― seem both lost. Cheery Wade-Browne came, & left blank blanker on going. Then came Miss Goldsmid, Sir Francis’s eldest sister; agreable & intelligent, but more remarkably ugly than I almost ever saw any woman. At 6 I left off work & went to W. Newtons ― Keed’s, & Robersons ― dining at the Blue Posts afterwards, μοναχῶς πολὺ.[1]

It is folly to allow oneself to reflect on what this August light & lovely weather would be elsewhere: ― I can’t move, ― so must think as little as possible. Half I wish I had packed up all & pantechniconized.

Τὶ μὲ μέλλει τώρα τὸν χρόνον παρασμένον εἰς τὸ νὰ σπουδάζει? ― Ἡ εὐχαρίστησις ἐκείνων τῶν ἡμέρων ― ποῦ θὰ εὐρηθή; ἡ ἡσυχία; ἡ καλητέρα ζωή μου; ― ἡ ὸραιώτης τῆς φύσεως; ἡ λαμβρὴ ἐξοχῆ τῆς Κέρκρας; ἡ καλὴ διάθεσις τοῦ καλοῦ Γεωργίου;

Ἐπέρασαν ὃλα; καὶ διὰ παντελῶς! ―

Καλὸ: πρέπει ἢ ὀγλήγωρα ἠ ἒπειτα νὰ χάσωμεν ὃλα: ― τὶ διάφορα λοίπον ― ἣ νὰ τὰ χάσωμεν τώρα ― ἦ πλέον ἀργὰ;[2]


[1] Completely alone (NB).

[2] Now that time has passed, what is the point in being eager? ― The pleasure of those days ― where will it be found? the quiet? my better life? ― the beauty of nature? the radiant country of Corfu? the good spirits of good Giorgio? Is it all gone? and forever!
Good: sooner or later we must lose everything: what difference does it make then if we lose them now or much later? (NB).

[Transcribed by Marco Graziosi from Houghton Library, Harvard University, MS Eng. 797.3. Image.]


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