Monthly Archives: March 2011

Sunday, 24 March 1861

X ― a horrid state of things.

Very fine, most lovely. ― But I “packed” ― & made ready to go. A note came, sent by ET ― from F.L. ― but I had written to her to say I was off.

It was difficult to go without seeing her again, but the drawbacks & chances of staying are too painful. So at 12 I walked up the down, young Frankland having proposed to ride or walk with me part of the way. This lad’s company was a great pleasure ― involving very little exertion on my part, for he is lively, & having been 5 years at Gibraltar, full of Spanish fun, which he pronounces well. His mare Fanny, wa also one  well worth seeing, & so, all over these wide quiet downs with the calm bright sea ― the hours passed delightfully.

Only ― ever the cold weary feeling ― something is gone. Farther we came close to Carisbrook, & then, instead of getting a Fly at Newport, I turned towards Calbourne ― stopping at a small Beer-shop for a glass of ale “are you a traveller, Sir?” We passed Swainston, & Calbourne ― memories all of persons gone. ― & just beyond, Frankland left me. Light hearted, but good & intellingent fellow. ―――

So I walked on: ― Newbridge: ― a new place not in my map: & so by windy roads ― with always a quiet beauty beyond ― to Yarmouth by 6.30.

“George” Hotel ―an old building. ― Good rooms ― & good plain dinner.

(Very kind letters from Mrs. Percy, Miss Dennett, & Edwd Crake. ―)

A fortnight at this hour 8 or 9 ― I was with that dear dear Ann. ―

[Transcribed by Marco Graziosi from Houghton Library, Harvard University, MS Eng. 797.3.]

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Saturday, 23 March 1861

X

Fine ― but gray. ― Ill & sad.

Young Frankland sate some time with me.

Drew Windham Hornby’s Wansfell view.

At 4 walked with Frankland to Farringford, but by reason of interruptions, it was near their dinner time, & they she asked him, but he did not stay.

In the morning, Mrs. Cameron, with a Miss Frere & a Miss Clough had come ― & they came in the Evening to AT’s. The whole evening vexed & worried me. Εκεὶνος πάντοτε πίνει παραπολὺ, ― καὶ τώρα λαλᾶ διὰ τόσα πράγματα ἂσχημα. ((He always drinks too much, ― and now he patters about so many ugly things (NB).))

Hers is a sad, tho’ a beautiful & true life. I resolved on coming away to go hence tomorrow.

Lovely moonlight.

[Transcribed by Marco Graziosi from Houghton Library, Harvard University, MS Eng. 797.3.]

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Friday, 22 March 1861

X

A lovely day all this.

But the inner darkness diminishes not.

Many letters.

Worked at colouring Zagóri & other sketches.

Went to AT’s at 2. Talk of the Welds ― C.W. is a bore. ― Warburton ― (who married one of the 3 Listers ―) was there for a short time.

Walked with Mr. Dakyns, ― the Downs & sea lovely. Dined at AT’s. ἡ ὁμιλία του εἶναι πολὺ ἂσχημος ― ἐπειτα ἀπὸ τὸ γεῦμα ― διὰ τὸ νὰ εἶναι πτωχός ― καὶ χαλασμένος κ.τ.λ. ((He talks very badly ― after dinner ― about being poor ― and broken etc. (NB).))

Moonlight.

Back by 11.

bright sun all day

[Transcribed by Marco Graziosi from Houghton Library, Harvard University, MS Eng. 797.3.]

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Thursday, 21 March 1861

O! dreary ― dreadful terrible days!! ―

Very bright & fine. Rose at 7 & walked up the [Ofton] Down. X.

Bah. ― returned. Mr. Frankland. ― Letters, Maria HornbyEllen, Mrs. Foy, & others: & to which I wrote several. I think I shall go from here on Monday. X

Coloured penned=drawings.

At 4.30 resolved to go to AT’s ― but was too late.

Λοιπὼν, ἐγευμάτισα μόνος. ((So, I dined alone (NB).)) ――

[Transcribed by Marco Graziosi from Houghton Library, Harvard University, MS Eng. 797.3.]

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Wednesday, 20 March 1861

7.35 to 8.30 walked on downs. Gray day. ― speculations on future ― here, London, or where?

Breakfast ― & began to colour the last Mt. Athos views. Meanwhile ― the wind riz & the waves [bloo].

Ahi! it is well to sham laughing ― but I feel as if I could laugh no more ― really. Those last hours of dearest Ann, & the sight of her dead, are great & dreadful realities ― but the knowledge that I am so alone & can appeal to her no more, is far worse ― & ever increasing.

Many letters: from Ellen, Miss Morier, Mrs. [] Robinson, Mrs. Davidson, ― &c. MISS HORNBY IS DEAD. ―

Grew weary of drawing ― & of watching the sea.

At 10 to AT’s & talked with ET ― & tried to walk in the garden ― but the wind was too horrid.

Came back, & drew again: then it rained, & blew furiously. ― Mrs. Murrow ― (who never was in London before last June ―) did her best to “console my mind” ― as she said: telling me of the Q.’s visit here & of the Princess Helēēna &c. ― who made a picnic in her upper room. “Would you believe it Sir, those Princes & Princesses spoke common just like my own children! I could not have believed it Sir!” ―――

Played on Mrs. Frankland’s Piano: ― & at 6.30 dined alone. ― Mr. F. came in afterwards ―: really a nice fellow. ―

Sate & played & sang with him till 10.30.

[Transcribed by Marco Graziosi from Houghton Library, Harvard University, MS Eng. 797.3.]

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Tuesday, 19 March 1861

Windy ― cold ― but no rain. Left Lymington at 8 ― & 8.15 steam to Yarmouth ― by 8.45. ― Passage rough. Fly to lower Hotel at Freshwater ― Royal Albion ― Murrow’s. ― Then went to Farringford & had a long talk with dear good E.T. ― afterwards walked ― or pottered with Alfred. (The paragraph in the Court Journal it seems, did relate to C. & Anne Weld.)

In the afternoon, arranged things at the Hotel ― & went back to dinner. Dakyns the Tutor. At 10.30 we all A.T. & he walked together to the Hotel with me. Moonlight.

[Transcribed by Marco Graziosi from Houghton Library, Harvard University, MS Eng. 797.3.]

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Monday, 18 March 1861

X

Rose at 7: perfectly bright: ― from 7.45 to 8.15 walked ― attended by the queer little Scotch dog ― to Mr. Lyles ― & looked at the old Cedars.

Breakfast & came away in the omnibus at 9.15.

From Waterloo, cab to Mr. Lawrence’s ― where I paid £5.5.0 for his fees of 2 visits, & for the man who was to give dearest Ann Chloroform.

What a happiness is it that the operation was given up!

― At Stratford Pl. found many letters. ― Wrote, & packed, & sent Thomas to Drummond’s with Mr. Edwards’ 103£. At 2 came to Waterloo Station, ― & at 3 ― rail, by 6, to Lymington.

But, δὲν εἶναι ἀτμούπλεον ((There is no steamboat (NB).)) ― so I wait here till tomorrow.

Abode at the Angel Inn ― dreary & dumb. 40 people in the Coffee-room ― so I dined alone in a large room with a piano. Cold & sad.

[Transcribed by Marco Graziosi from Houghton Library, Harvard University, MS Eng. 797.3.]

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